THE SCOTTISH ADVENTURES OF A CRUISE SHIP ADDICT

News came through the BBC last night that another cruise ship was in trouble in the Antarctic. The 2,900 tonne Cuidad de Ushaia ran aground in Wilhelmina Bay. At the moment, passengers and crew were not in danger, and a joint rescue mission is being planned by the Argentinian and Chilians to rescue the passengers. What price do we have to pay to visit remote places? Antarctica is one of the remotest places on earth, and mainly accessible by ship. Any ship which faces problems has to rely on other ships in the area for help. Luckily the Cuidad de Ushaia was specially built for these conditions, but each year cruise ships are allowed into the area which are not and this is where the problems start. Also there is the challenge of rescuing people from stricken ships. The Ushaia only had 89 passengers and 33 crew, but what happens when you have 700 passengers and crew to rescue? The Antarctic infrastructure would be completely stressed out. Its nice to be able to visit these remote places,

Another ship has been hijacked by the Somalis. Something needs to be done about this. This is a popular shipping route, not just for cargo, but for cruise ships. Back in November 2005 Somalian Pirates tried to attack the cruise ship Seabourn Spirit, which is owned by Seabourn Cruise Line, part of the Carnival Corporation, who own lines such as Cunard, P and O, Princess, Holland America and Costa. Seabourn is an up-market cruise line so it is quite possible that the Pirates knew there would be rich picking on board this ship. Thanks to the crew's quick thinking, the Pirates were scared off when the ship's officers ordered a loud acoustic bang to frighten the Pirates off. Luckily it worked. There is increased cruise ship activity in the area as this is an up and coming cruising area. Its an area cruise ships enter after transiting the Suez Canal or when on world cruises or visiting places around the Indian Ocean. Can you imagine the scene if these pirates boarded a cruise ship? T

Tuesday 11 November 2008 - Southampton The QE2's late arrival caused its own set of problems. Passengers' luggage was late in being unloaded, which meant passengers were late disembarking. Normally this would annoy us because we'd want to get home, but as we were in no hurry to leave the QE2, we didn't mind. After breakfast, Nana, Agnes, Evie, Campbell and I ensconsed ourselves in the Lido (informal restaurant). We had food, we had toilets, we had the ability to go outside - we were set up quite happy for the long haul!! We realised quickly that we wouldn't get off the ship before 10.30am so we made a pact that we would try to stay on board and watch for the flyover, when a plane was to drop a million poppies over the QE2. Indeed, as 11am approached, there was no indication that we would be called. We all went outside to watch the ceremony for the minute's silence, and then I went up to the Yacht Club deck to see the plane. I didn't actually see it drop popp

Tuesday 11 November 2008 - Arriving into Southampton Sometimes you don't realise you are in the middle of an historic event until it happens! It's just the way of the world, I guess, being in just the right place at the right, or even wrong time. At 5.30am this morning I arrived on the Observation Deck of QE2 to watch her final arrival into Southampton. But nothing was happening! I could see the Fawley Oil Refinery to my left, but the ship was going nowhere. I was confused. At this point, QE2 should be just about arriving at the berth next to the QEII Terminal. I spoke to Gerry, who, like me, is also a shipping enthusiast. His reply was "This Queen ain't going anywhere, she's run aground". Minutes later, Captain McNaught made an announcement that indeed QE2 had run aground. He added that it happened when the "QE2 was turning a very tight corner. The wind caught her stern and pushed her onto soft clay". But he also stressed that we were not to worry..

Monday 10 November 2008 - At Sea Usually I'm the one who is badly seasick but not this time! I wasn't feeling too great, but Campbell was worse. Even Nana noticed it at breakfast when Campbell didn't say a thing. Not like him. He left breakfast rather abruptly when the cooked items came! Later on I found him in bed, in a state, groaning like the first person who had ever suffered from seasickness. You know the type of man-flu thing! It didn't help that we were in the Bay of Biscay in bad weather. It was awful. The QE2 corkscrewed and then at various points listed over to one side. A couple of time I thought, that's it, we're all gone. By the late afternoon, we had rounded the top of France and were in the English Channel. The weather and the waves started to calm down. I finished out packing. Campbell showed his face, and did some of his packing. Nana celebrated her 70th Birthday on board today. We put Happy 70th Birthday Banners on her room door, and decorated

Sunday 9 November 2008 - Vigo This is at least my fourth time in Vigo, but it is the first time I've actually got off the ship. Usually Vigo is on the way out after a bad crossing of the Bay of Biscay, or its on the way back when it is the last port before Southampton. I've learned the hard way to pack on the last port day of the cruise. There is nothing worse than feeling seasick and the ship is rolling, and trying to pack a case. Believe me, not to be recommended! As QE2 wasn't leaving Vigo to 7pm, Evie and I had a sleep in the afternoon and then Campbell took us into the town. There is a massive shopping centre two minutes walk from the ship and the first shop was a wine shop! Well I was at home! I also bought a beautiful necklace there with huge blue, clear, red and black beads. The weather was awful. It rained and rained. This was a taste of things to come!

Saturday 8 November - At Sea By this time, we have got into a routine. Breakfast, Evie goes to nursery, I have some free time, lunch, sleep, swimming, dinner, drinks, get Evie, bed. I tried to do some University work this morning, but it was impossible to find a table to work from. I eventually shared a table outside the library with a lady compiling lists about dogs. Don't ask! I find this really peculiar about QE2. You don't take a cruise on QE2, you take a voyage. They have planned entertainment, but not to the same extent that you find on cruise lines such as P and O or Princess. This is because they assume that as a Cunard customer, you do not leave your brain at the dockside when you board, and that you will find something constructive to do, such as reading a book or just relaxing. They don't feel the need to keep you entertained all the time. My favourite joke was from the Captain: He was referring to Royal Caribbean's Navigator of the Seas, which was docked wit

Friday 7 November - Gibraltar/At Sea Well, I finally managed to get into the Boardroom this morning for a few hours. I missed getting off the ship at Gibraltar because I had a lecture in the afternoon. As I haven't been lecturing much on ships this year, I needed the practice. It also didn't help that I hadn't performed the Queen Elizabeth lecture for a couple of years. We all met in the Mauretania Restaurant for lunch. Nana, Agnes and Evie went shopping, Campbell went booze shopping. Half the crew ended up in Morrisons supermarket. At 2pm QE2 slipped her moorings in Gibraltar and headed for the sea.  At 3pm I started my lecture about the original Queen Elizabeth liner (1938-1968(out of service)/1972(destroyed by fire). Parts of the original Queen Elizabeth are on board QE2, such as a 20ft high painting of the Queen Mother, a painting of our present Queen and Duke of Edinburgh when they were young, and bas-reliefs which were (I think) in the Cabin smoking room. The original

6 November 2008 - At Sea Do you ever have one of those days when nothing seems to go right? That was my day today. I just notification that I was doing a lecture - tomorrow, 3pm - and I needed to work on my talk. The only places to work on QE2 is the business centre (full of people), the computer room (full of people) and the Boardroom. Every time I tried to get into the Boardroom, someone was in there trying to use the WiFi internet. Then Campbell announced that he didn't want lunch in the Mauretania Restaurant. I mistakingly mentioned that I think they had an alternative dining venue in The Golden Lion Pub on board. The Golden Lion is the main place where all the smokers on board congregate and you cannot find a place to sit down. Worse than that, you have to pass through it en-route to the Mauretania Restaurant and clothes end up smelling of smoke and you can hardly get through the fug (smoke). Its a horrible place.  Campbell ended up in a mood and dragged Evie and I off to the

5 November 2008 - Athens In the distance, behind the cruise ship Thomson Spirit, a funnel appeared with a picture of the hauntingly beautiful Mona Lisa. I recognised her instantly. Not because of the picture, but the ship underneath her. This was the old ocean liner Kungsholm. Kungsholm has played a major part in my life (almost as much as the Cunard Queens). She was built at John Browns Shipbuilders in Clydebank, the ship before QE2. Between her and QE2, the shipyard went bust. After a while travelling transatlantic for the Swedish America Line, she was bought by P&O Princess and renamed Sea Princess. I took my first ever cruise on her in 1986, and I visited Ephasus, Santorini, Jerusalem and, of course, Athens. I owe her a debt of gratitude because it was through her that I first developed my love of Greek history and architecture. In 1995 we was moved to P&O cruises and became the Victoria. I travelled on her again in 2001. I was almost 6 months pregnant at the time and made

4 November 2008 - Zakinthos, Greece QE2 anchored in the bay and we were all transferred by tender (lifeboat) out to Zakinthos Town. She looked beautiful and resplendent in the bay. A proper ocean liner. I had been in Zakinthos about 18 years ago with two friends from University. I thought it would be a great holiday. They could lie on the beach, and I could go and look at Greek Temples as I was (and still am) into Greek history and archaeology. The island disappointed me. Their main resort, Laganas was like Blackpool with sun. We stayed in Argassi which was still quite nice, but getting commercialised. As for the temples... the whole place was flattened by an earthquake in 1953, so there was nothing. We went for a tour of the island... nothing. The only mildly interesting place was Zakinthos Town because it still retained a little Greek charm. Yeuch! After getting the tender at 11.30am I wandered aimlessly around some shops and then back onto the tender at 12.30am for lunch. Nothing to

Monday 3 November 2008 - Dubrovnik, Croatia This is my third visit to Dubrovnik. I love the place. There is something magical as you approach the battlements and the walled city. This was the first place I ever visited when I went cruising. Back in 1986 Agnes and I flew to Dubrovnik to cruise on Sea Princess for a week, visiting Izmir in Turkey, Athens, Santorini, and Corfu. That was before the war and they had a little cable car which took tourists up to the top of the hill. You could get a wonderful view of the city. This is where I also met 'my little church'. I'm not at all religous, and I don't usually visit religous buildings, unless they are Greek Temples, but I always visit this little church in Dubrovnik. Evie came along with me. We counted the steps up to it - she got 36 and I got puffed out and needing resuscitation. Until then Evie had been fairly quiet, but as soon as we got in the church she felt this sudden urge to babble!  After leaving the church we hea

Sunday 2 November 2008 - Messina Messina on a Sunday is not the greatest place in the world. Sunday in a Catholic country means everything is closed and not much is happening. Our resident explorer, Campbell, was not about to sit down and watch the world go by. So as I was posting the last blog to you, he, Agnes and Evie, dragged a rather hesitant Nana off to visit the mainland of Italy by rail ferry.  Nana is the sort of person (a bit like myself) who is not in the least bit adventurous, but once you have shown her the way, she knows it all. Well, it was Nana who tried to communicate with Italians who couldn't speak English with a series of hand-gestures, and Nana who got them on the right ferry home! So much for not wanting to go! After I had written the blog, I wandered off to look at the ship berthed in front of us... Royal Caribbean's Navigator of the Seas. I reckon she is about 100,000 gross registered tonnes. I think she has flume rides and an ice rink. She will certainl

Friday 31 October 2008 - At Sea/Cagliari, Sardinia Evie went off Trick or Treating with the nursery staff and came back with a bag load of sweets. Dressed as a Pirate, I thought she might be made to walk the plank, but no, instead they did a far worse thing... returned her to us! Debi and Liz from the nursery took her out to the Sports Deck and Evie demanded sweets with menaces from the sports staff, and then off to the shop, where she was supplied with more sugar-induced rocket fuel!  Cagliari was wet! In fact, we were drenched. Campbell decided to take us all out for a walk. We went up hill, and up and up and up until I said I'd had enough. On our walk back down we got even more soaked. Instead of sightseeing, we met half the passengers fro the QE2 inside a department store! In the evening Evie and I dressed up as witched (Nana didn't need to as that is how she normally dresses! Only joking). Everyone admired our hats! Many of the public rooms on QE2 had turned into halloween

Saturday 1 November 2008 - Naples/Pompeii This was one of the highlights of the trip. Since studying O Grade and A Level Classical Studies at school, I had always wanted to visit Pompeii. I was definitely not disappointed. The ruins are quite something else. I thought it was going to be a couple of rows of shops and maybe a house, but there is streets and streets. I even had a seat in the Amphitheatre. Evie took Oscar with her and I ended up carrying him. I was showing Evie some ancient wallpaper - drawings on the plasterwork which brightened up the houses. One thing that I didn't realise was that it was originally a Greek settlement. I was surprised however to find out that the sea was once the same level as the walls at Pompeii. The town is quite a bit above the sea and about one mile inland. It just shows that global warming and cooling has been happening for centuries. Evie got bored half way around the ruins and ended up helping the tour guide, Ornella, by holding up her "

Thursday 30 October 2008 - At Sea In the morning Nana and Aggie (Evie's great aunt) took Evie, Oscar (The Longlevens Infant's School Ted) and Rex (my aunt's work's rhinocerous teddy) around the ship to be photographed. Meanwhile Campbell and I rendezvoued with an old friend - Retired Commodore Ronald Warwick. The name Warwick is synonymous with QE2. Ron's father, Bil, was the first Captain of the QE2, and Ron himself was QE2's Captain for many years before transferring on to Queen Mary 2. I think Ron is wonderful. I remember my first meeting with him. It was just after I'd published my Queen Mary book and I had had a bad review from a magazine. I was really down in the dumps about it because the magazine had totally misread the market my book was aiming at. It was a real hatchet job. Ron said that I shouldn't be bothered with them and that they didn't understand what I was trying to achieve - my books are for joe public not rivetcounters (the cruise

Wednesday 29 October 2008 - Lisbon Well this morning was great fun. I woke at two o'clock feeling seasick and the ship was rolling. Speaking to a couple of passengers, they had glasses falling off ledges, bottles of water off shelves, clothes falling off hangers, and people almost rolling out of bed. One of the shops lost 5 ghastly QE2 limited edition plates - I can only think it was a blessing! Evie and Campbell took off for Lisbon on the shuttle bus. Evie got off the bus and then started asking Campbell "when do we go home?" Despite ice cream, drinks and a new watch, he had to take her home early. Nana, Agnes and I thought we'd take a short stroll around the marina as we had been to Lisbon before. Then we decided to walk a short distance to the monument. Short distance my foot! It was about a mile. I was totally exhausted and we had to take a taxi back! Evie, Campbell and I had dinner in the informal restaurant called the Lido. It was a French Evening. We tried to c

Tuesday 28 October 2008 - At Sea We headed out through a Force 7 Gale and rough seas last night doing a speed of 28 knots. To put this into perspective, a normal cruise ship can do a maximum of 23 knots (downhill with a tailwind) and would start to avoid anything as rough or rougher. Imagine, normal cruise ship equals Nissan Micra, QE2 equals a Porsche. But the QE2 can go faster, she can do about 36 knots, second only to the SS United States which could do over 40 knots. No wonder they chose QE2 for the Falklands. Unfortunately this morning Nana looked like an extra from Rentaghost. She was suffering from seasickness and was sick at least two times. She began to look better once she had something solid in her stomach. As for me, I was feeling seasick, but I follow the routine of fruit for breakfast, one Biodramina (a wonderful seasickness pill) and plenty of sleep and I'm usually fine. Campbell and Evie headed down to the indoor pool this morning. Evie is in her element - swimming

We're finally on board and QE2 is as beautiful as ever. A few people warned me she was held together with sticking plaster, but that is totally untrue. She is as wonderful as the last time I was on her. Everyone is settled into their cabins and Nana and Agnes really like the ship. They too weren't expecting much, but I think they are overwhelmed by her. Not many ships today have character.  There have been rumours that she is going to Dubai with all her paintings and fixtures on board. I cannot believe Cunard are letting the Aspey's Silver QE2 go off to Dubai. This model QE2, made entirely in pure silver, is about three foot long and about two foot high! Also there are real paintings of the Queen and Prince Philip when they were young and also the Queen Mother on board which were on the original Queens, and they are going too! Sacrilige! Anyway, we all on board and enjoying ourselves.

As I am about to board one of my favourite ships - QE2 - this afternoon, I wanted to talk about her name.  Originally the name of Cunard's ships ended in -ia, eg Britannia, Carpathia, Bothnia. But when Cunard and the White Star Line (owners of the Titanic) merged in 1934, this created a problem as all White Star Line ships had the suffix -ic, eg Olympic, Cedric, Britannic.  The first Cunard White Star liner to be completed after this merger was Hull 534 at John Brown's Shipyard, in Clydebank, Scotland. What could they call her? Then someone had an idea. King George V was approached and officials asked if they could name the ship "after Britain's most illustrious Queen" - meaning Queen Victoria. The King replied, "of course you can name it after my wife". Thus the new liner ended up as Queen Mary. Now the original Queen Elizabeth liner, didn't have such problems as it was named after the Queen at the time - Queen Elizabeth.  The Queen Elizabeth 2 was

From tomorrow, my blog will slightly change as I will be heading on board QE2 for her last proper cruise before she goes off to Dubai. I'm not sure whether posting this blog from QE2 will be easy or not, so it might be a little sporadic.  I am in port on these dates: 29 Oct   Lisbon (last time I was here it was so foggy I couldn't see the huge bridge across the Tagus! We were right under it!) 31 Oct   Sardinia  1 Nov   Naples (Pompeii)  2 Nov Sicily (its a Sunday - everything will be closed)  3 Nov Dubrovnik (gorgeous)  4 Nov Zakinthos (there's nothing there - I'll get to practice my Greek on the locals)  5 Nov Athens (The Acropolis)  8 Nov Gibraltar (Shopping - ye-hey!)  9 Nov Vigo (its a Sunday again - 4th time lucky, I'm hoping to finally get to visit this place!) 11 Nov Southampton (a big party!) We're taking two stowaways with us: Oscar, my daughter Evie's school teddy, and Rex, the rhinocerous from my aunty's work.

On Thursday morning, a very upsetting piece of junk mail flopped through my letter box. The brochure was entitled "Announcing Saga Rose's Final Voyages". I was a Guest Lecturer on Saga Rose on a Christmas/New Year cruise down to Madeira in 2006. Despite me being at least 14 years younger than the minimum age for a Saga cruise, I thought the ship and the people on board were amazing. The food was the highest quality I have had on a cruise ship, the service impeccable. The rooms were of the 'old school' - filled with wood and panelling. They were gorgeous. Captain Rentell had a totally wicked sense of humour, including playing the baddie in the Christmas Pantomime, and the Cruise Director, Jane Edwards, worked tirelessly to make sure we all enjoyed ourselves. Even the weather over the Bay of Biscay was good - miracles really do happen! In fact, my favourite story was sitting down to lunch one day. I looked out the window to see the sea washing it. We were at least 3

Well, that was a bit of a shock...NOT! It was just a matter of time before someone was caught trying to smuggle drugs on a cruise ship. For those who have not heard the story. The BBC news reported yesterday that seven people had been taken into custody off the P&O cruise ship Arcadia after 30 kg of drugs were found strapped to their bodies.  The latest reports from the BBC say that four people have been charged, aged 19, 25, 26 and 41. How stupid could these supposed drugs carriers have been? The three younger people would have stood out on Arcadia like a sore thumb, especially if they were not related. The demographic of P&O line is 50+ and couples. The exception to this is the school holidays when a lot of children travel. Not on Arcadia though - she's a child-free ship. But I've travelled many times from Southampton and I have yet to see customs officers stop people coming from a cruise ship. I have a theory that sniffer dogs must have smelt the drugs on their cases

When Samuel Cunard's little 1,100 ton steamship Britannia chugged her way out of Liverpool towards the new world in 1840, it was amazing to think that she sparked a competition which is still around today. The race had started to build the biggest and fastest ships across the atlantic. These ocean greyhounds would attract the creme of society who would want the kudos of travelling on the newest and biggest ships. Immigrants were also attracted by the size and speed because this meant they could start their new lives faster and it was thought that the largest ships were also the safest! In fact, travellers in the early days of steamships were very influenced by funnel size - the more funnels a ship had the more safer and sophisticated it was! A few ships even had 'dummy' funnels in order to attract more passengers. Question: can you name all 13 four-funnelled ships? In 1840, the passenger ship was 1,100 tons (Britannia), by 1911, it was 45,000 tons (Olympic), by 1937, 79,200

Three giants have appeared in Southampton! Firstly, there is Cunard's QE2. Not a giant in size but a giant in reputation. The modern's world's most famous ocean liner is embarking her passengers today for her final double transatlantic voyage - from Southampton to New York and back to Southampton. Cunard have been famous for their transatlantic voyages for over 160 years, since their first scheduled sailing by Britannia in 1840. This will be a particularly poignant voyage as this will be the last time she visits her second home, New York. Rumour has it that New York will not let her leave without a massive celebration. Accompanying her on this double transatlantic is her sister, Queen Mary 2 - a giant in size at almost 160,000 gross registered tonnes. This is a real treat for ocean liner lovers everywhere. Finally, in port at the same time is P and O's Ventura, She is the newest and largest addition to the P and O fleet at over 100,000 gross registered tonnes. Ventura i

Professor Willms presentation at the 1st International Cruise Conference in Bremerhaven started me thinking about my own experiences of cruise ships in port and the visitors they attract. I think the most amazing vision of this was arriving in Cherbourg on Queen Mary 2's maiden arrival in France. Over 10,000 people were waiting to see the ship arrive at 7am, and this had swelled into 15,000 by the time she left! On our arrival, fire boats were spurting plumes of water as a salute to the uncrowned queen of France, and a large floatilla of small boats  hovered dangerously near this enormous ship's bow. But the crowning moment was when she approached the terminal, she let out a roar from her massive horn! We all covered our ears and my daughter screamed - we couldn't hear her scream! One of these horns was from the original Queen Mary (now in Long Beach, California) and can be heard from over 10 miles away. France was proud of its Queen! But why had these people come to visit

The 1st International Cruise Conference took place on 26/27 September 2008 at the University of Applied Sciences in Bremerhaven, Germany. I presented a paper at the conference on 'establishing the need of a standardised rating system for cruise ships' - part of my undergraduate dissertation at University. I was a bit overawed, as the speakers either had PhDs or worked in the cruise industry. But what I lacked in experience and academia, I hoped I made up for in enthusiasm about the cruising. As a passionate cruise traveller and cruise ship lecturer, I come across people who are so confused by the variety of different cruise lines and ships that they do not know which one to pick. I'm hoping my little piece of research might just highlight the need for a proper rating system which is easily understood and accessible. Other speakers at the conference included Brian Johnson, Director of Fleet Training and Employee Relations at Princess Cruises, who spoke fascinatingly on "